mo·ti·va·tion [moh-tuhvey-shuhn]
– noun
1. the act or an instance of motivating.
2. the state or condition of being motivated.
3. something that motivates; inducement; incentive.
– noun
1. the psychological feature that arouses an organism to action toward a desired goal; the reason for the action; that which gives purpose and direction to behavior; “we did not understand his motivation”; “he acted with the best of motives” 
2. the condition of being motivated; “his motivation was at a high level” 
3. the act of motivating; providing incentive

ac·count·a·bil·i·ty  [uh-koun-tuhbil-i-tee]
– noun
1. the state of being accountable, liable, or answerable. 

– noun
1. responsibility to someone or for some activity 

These are two words that I have not used in my vocabulary as of late. The last time I ran (and I use the term loosely) was nearly a year ago. April 8, 2006. A 5K. And I was out of shape then. Whooo boy. Do we have some work ahead of us or what?

January was very good for getting to the gym. So was that first week in February. Not so much since then.

So, here we are. It’s Goal Setting Time.

1) Sign up for Running 101 class. Duh. Yes, I know how to run. One foot in front of the other. Just like walking. Only faster. This will help me get my mileage back up. We’re starting at 0 again.
2) Manage my eating. My least favorite part. I love to eat. My ass shows it. I love food. Food tastes good. Food satisfies. I was raised to eat. I just exercised enough as a kid that it didn’t matter. Now it matters. So, cut back on the bad. And really, I don’t eat that much that is ‘bad’. I just consume too much. Portion control is really the key that I’ll be looking at.
3) Get more sleep. One of my resolutions that I’m falling down on. Part of it is a problem I have with sleeping. My brain just doesn’t shut down. The only time I’ve really been able to sleep well is when I’ve been on anti-depressants. They also help with the depression that I’ve suffered from since I was 17. That’s kind of a separate thing though.
4) Keep a training journal. That’s where this comes in. When I trained for the Nike Women’s, I was strict about keeping a training journal. It was the first time ever that I’d kept up with anything like that. It gave me great motivation to add lines in that journal, and watch my pace and mileage improve. It was also great that I counted up miles-run-to-date. 25! 50! 100! 200! Great achievements.
5) Be true to myself. Not every day is going to be great. Some days it is going to hurt. But, I’m not going to quit. I’m going to stop making excuses. Just do it. Cheesy, but it’s true.
6) Lose weight. It’s not possible to be on a diet while training for a marathon. You just don’t get the calories you require. My training and my paying attention to what and how much I put in my mouth will naturally lead to this. But honestly? In order for me get into what would be considered a ‘healthy weight range’ for my height, gender, and age I need to lose. This is embarassing. But I’m being honest and laying it out in the table. 80 pounds. This won’t be a ‘goal’ to accomplish by the marathon date. But, it’s out there.
7) Run 26.2 miles in NYC on November 4, 2007. I have a guaranteed entry this year since I deferred last year. And I want it. Coincidentally, this date will also be the 8 year anniversary of the day my great-grandmother passed away. So, I will dedicate this race to her. I don’t want to let my great-grandma down.

I deserve this. I can do this. I have done it before. It’s an achievement that not many people are willing to train for. In 2005, I was 2 of 383,000 marathon finishers (Nike Women’s and White Rock)! That’s out of ~300,000,000 million people living in the US at the time. This is for me. For me.

So many times, it happens too fast,
You trade your passion for glory,
Don’t lose your grip on the dreams of the past,
You must fight just to keep them alive…